When Men Were Men & Women Were Women

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Looking After Ladies - By La Raquel

LOOKING AFTER LADIES.

Being a man is quite simple though it requires some time and effort. Fellas, we at WMWM know that you are already putting your time and effort in at work, but remember, your boss will not rock you gently to sleep at night (and if he does you should probably ask for a transfer)
nor will he cook you a roast.

It is also worth while to remember that the time and effort you put in at work is indirectly accumulated in a round about endeavors to snare a foxy lady...

Work>cash>fancy car>get laid.

So, even though you are tired after a long day of impressing your superiors, and really just want to curl up and rest... don't forget why you are doing it, otherwise it has all been pointless (except of course for the fat cat up top.)

Although it might help you find the door (no promises) money is not the key.

You have to know how to behave like a man. Spend long enough behaving like a man and you will eventually become one.

The first step to being a man (and not a little boy) is LOOKING AFTER THE LADIES.
Looking after the ladies comes under many different categories, but the first and most important way is to protect them.

This requires a back bone, an intrinsic component of a man, so if you're unsure where to find yours, simply ask someone you trust to place their finger at the top centre of your bottom and run their hand upwards. There it is!!

Now that you've found your back bone, you're on your way.

The second most important ingredient in protecting a woman is mental discipline. This is crucial if you want to protect her from yourself. There comes a time in every good mans life when he has a delirious woman spitting poison gibberish at him, and it is important to know how not to punch her annoying face in. Remember, you are the man, you can fix this.

You will also need to protect the women you know from other males who are not as cool as you. This requires courage (see backbone), and honor.

Once you have courage, mental discipline and honor... The rest will come naturally.

WHY LOOK AFTER THE LADIES?

Ladies who have not been looked after by men have a tendency to form bitter coalitions with other females. Once these teams have been forged the ladies will come up with new and excruciating ways to hate you and all your male colleagues... You need to nip these coalitions in the bud before they form. To do this you need to go straight to the source.

It is a sad fact that nearly half of all women will be raped by the age of twenty. One in four is a victim of domestic violence. The males responsible are giving you a bad name, and you need to find them and break their noses. They are responsible for women's distrust of you and partially responsible for your subsequent lack of sex. When you see it this way, when a male hurts a female, he might as well be cutting your penis off.

The good thing about this is you can use this situation to your advantage by being the dashing knight who protects women, slays dragons and gets laid by a`princess. Imagine what the ladies will think when you turn up at poker night with a torn shirt and cut lip, and casually sigh... "It's nothing girls, just stopping a rapist."

Three things are inevitable... one of them will get you a beer, one of them will rub your back, and they will all be telling their sexy single friends about you for weeks. Welcome to the smorgasbord of love, fella.

HOW TO LOOK AFTER THE LADIES.

There are many, many manly ways to look after the ladies, so we will be giving you this section in installments. This month we will be looking at how to break a guys nose. Breaking a guys nose is easy if you know how. WMWM have approached several Sydney bouncers, boxers, martial artists, police, and street thugs on the NINE most effective techniques for breaking a guys face without splitting your knuckles.

So read on, study up, practice on your buddies, and bide your time. Luckily for you their are so many guys bashing women you wont have to wait long for your chance to prove to all of lady kind just how much of a man you are.

Remember, once they know you are a man, they will want to touch your penis.

And that is the point.

Posted by Pablo at 11:04 AM 0 Comments